Sunday, January 28, 2007
` 9:17 PM
week 1 of the course has gone by. well so far so good. learnt much of the techniques for close combat. esp useful when dealing with drunken ppl in clubs haha. the techniques learnt are simple yet deadly. u wanna try jus come find me. i will give you a crash course lol.
my week was marred by diahorrea and intense vomiting. i ate 7 half boiled eggs over 3 days. my stomach felt weird on thurs aft lunch. like there is smth gutting out in between my lungs and stomach. had difficulty breathing and feeling uncomfortable. when i went home with yx and adelene, i had to sit down for the whole train ride cos i was feeling giddy while standing. mum brought me to see the chinese doctor at night. the moment i gulped the medicine. i threw up everything. i went to slp without eating anything cos no appetite. anyway. im feeling much better as im typing this entry...
nxt wk is part 2 of the course. got duty again on sat. most of the specs went thailand for ex. left 6 of us to do all the duties. ugh... at least on the lighter note. catchin happy birthday on tues with yx.
weeks jus pass by without much joy in it.. ppl busy in their own lives. one way of another. who will stop to look the things around him.. whats the meaning in life.
Monday, January 22, 2007
` 10:19 PM
what is destiny? the explanation given by the dicitonary "the predetermined, usually inevitable or irresistible, course of events". so its already being planned. its inevitable. so when your born. your life is predetermined. so it makes no difference if you work hard to change your destiny cos it cant be altered anyway. then why people still try so hard to change their destiny and life? why people work so hard to break out of that circle of predetermined path?
i thought i have hide that pain deep inside me. a place im not even sure where is it. but why it still aches whenever my mum brought it up. so much for sarcastic remarks bout my blotched attempt to make do with my a levels results. i cant help but still feel so real bout the importance of getting gd grades. its still a pain hard to subside.
life is still ok. on the mundane side. when i look at the pictures of you. i still feel a faint tinge of sadness.... oh wells life still go on all the same...
Sunday, January 21, 2007
` 12:48 AM
friday was the change of command parade. straight after our outfield. it marks the official handover of duties and the men. i am officially in charge of the signal men. they will be under me till we ORD nxt feb. i dont know how will it goes so just see as we go by. for the next 3 weeks i will be going over to pasir labar camp for close combat training course. sounds fun but the most important thing is that we get to stay out for 3 WHOLE FUCKING WEEKS. ok its less than a month but screw it!
been saving quite some bit of money recently. been racking my brain for something that i can buy but nth seems to come to my mind. chinese new year is round the corner so this shd give me perfect excuse to splurge on some clothes. but i dont think so. i might have stand by during the chinese new year peiod so no point buyin new clothes. i have been trying to come up with a list of things i wanna buy. long sleeve shirts. think i need that. looks smarter haha. berms is quite a must cos im sorely lacking that. shoes. cxan buy sneakers. my trusty adidas shoes is giving way ever since i bought it at the end of yr 1. its cheap yet cool. at least from my point of view haha. unique cos i see noone wearing it during jc days.crumpler bad is a must. but shall br buying with xiao mao when we ORD for uni purposes haha. yup. think thats all so far.
i want to get my driving license so i have to save up. plus family isnt really financially stable so have to think twice before spending. life isnt a bed of roses after all eh?
your presence isnt that important to me now since you nv cared to listen when im down.
Sunday, January 14, 2007
` 2:01 PM
Here I am, lost in the light of the moon that comes through my window
Bathed in blue, the walls of my memory divide the thorns from the roses
It's you and the roses
Touch me and I will follow in your afterglow
Heal me from all this sorrow
As I let you go I will find my way when I see your eyes
Now I'm living in your afterglow
Here I am, lost in the ashes of time, but who wants tomorrow?
In between the longing to hold you again
I'm caught in your shadow, I'm losing control
My mind drifts away, we only have today
Touch me and I will follow in your afterglow
Heal me from all this sorrow
As I let you go I will find my way
I will sacrifice 'til the blinding day when I see your eyes
Now I'm living in your afterglow
Bathed in blue, the walls of my memory divide the thorns from the roses
It's you who is closest...yeah its you...
Saturday, January 13, 2007
` 12:44 AM
its been a long time since a last blogged. life has been pretty much the same. spent my leave quite wisely. meet up with alot of friends. friends that i wanted to meet bt simply no time esp xiao mao! haha. had a great time with him. catchin up and talkin cock and making fun of each other.
yr 2007 will be tough to pass by since my unit will be going to south africa and india for overseas evaluation exercise. its been a totally different experience when you have men under you. men who are used to not listening to your instruction and always challenging your authority. they will show attitude if you show them yours.
maybe its better to be a officer or a men. its stressed to be a sgt when your in a middle of nowhere. get fucked by your officer and get played upon by your men.
my greatest wish in 2007 is to get my driving license. and to get over NS unscathed. and to be a little happier. and to accept the way things are and live on with it.